WRONG NUMBER

This morning, I called the local senior center, but rather than leave a message, I asked if I could just call back again later. And so after 30 minutes I called again. However, when I dialed the number again, 833-2373, instead of reaching the senior center I was connected to the Walgreens drugstore. I thought I might have just misdialed and tried the number again, but once again the person answering the phone said, “Walgreens, how can I help you?”

Well that’s weird I thought and decided maybe there was something wrong with my phone. And so, I switched to my portable phone and dialed the number for the third time. Again, I reached Walgreens. At this point, I called the telephone company. “I’ve dialed the senior center every week for the last few years and can’t understand why all of a sudden I’m now reaching the drugstore. Something must be wrong”

The operator was very patient and checked into the problem. “I’m sorry,” she said, “but the number you dialed, 833-2373 does belong to Walgreens.” “Amazing,” I said, “I can’t understand it.” She then checked the telephone listings and courteously told me, the telephone number of the senior center is 831-2373.” I felt so foolish and apologized profusely for wasting her time.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

PRIZE MONEY

I have tried to figure it out, but I just can’t come up with any answer. How much prize money do I need to offer to attract people to my website contest? When I launched the site three years ago, I set the prize money for the biweekly contests at $50 for funny photos and $10 for cute photos and $500 and $100 for the 6-month bonus prize winners. I had hoped advertisers would cover the cost. However, I have yet to line up any advertisers and thus, must pay the prize money myself.

Last fall, to lower my expenses I cut the prizes for the funny photos to $20 and $200. Unfortunately, since last fall, the number of visitors to my site dropped about 25%. Obviously, I thought, my reduced prizes have also reduced the traffic to my site. And so I’ve been feeling discouraged until yesterday. The winner of the $10 bi-weekly cute-photo contest not only sent me an email to confirm her address, but sent me in CAPTAL LETTERS a very excited thank you. She was absolutely thrilled to win the contest!!

You can imagine my surprise. She won only $10, yet couldn’t have been happier. So the question remains, “How much prize money do I need to offer to attract people to my website contest?”

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

MY DAUGHTER’S ANNIVERSARY

How did I possibly forget? How in the world did I ever let it slip my mind that Saturday was my daughter’s anniversary? She and James celebrated their 17th anniversary and the day passed by without my even calling to wish them a happy anniversary. I felt just awful. Ironically, I had marked my calendar with their names, but I didn’t even remember to check my calendar.

It’s not the first time which makes me feel even worse. When my son was 9, I forgot his birthday until after dinner. And when my daughter was 14 she went off to school before I realized it was her birthday. What a terrible mother !!!

However, I do have a little consolation. When my ex-husband and I were married 4 years, my parents had not sent me an anniversary card. I didn’t think twice about it as cards in the mail sometimes do arrive late. But about 7:00 that evening while my ex-husband was still at work, there was a knock on the door. Lo and behold, I opened the door and there stood my parents. “Oh,” I exclaimed, “You came for my anniversary.” But the look on their face immediately told me their visit was a coincidence. They had forgotten it was my anniversary.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

WINNING AT BRIDGE

A couple of weeks ago, I felt terribly discouraged because my partner and I ended up in last place three consecutive times at the Duplicate Bridge Club. But now in the past week, we have finished in 3rd place last Saturday and 4th place yesterday. Of course, I felt thrilled. It wasn’t 1st place, but much better than last.

At the same time you have to wonder what makes the difference. Obviously my skill level hasn’t changed in such a short time. Nor is it the cards dealt to me, as in duplicate bridge everyone else play with the exact same cards. Thus, it seems the only explanation is luck. For example, the mistakes others make, provide a lucky advantage.

I’ll probably never figure it out, but it sure feels great to be among the winners.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

SEARCH ENGINES / ATTORNEYS

Today my blog is an experiment. I want to discover if the unprecedented number of photos I received for my website contest on Sunday has a relationship to the blog I wrote on Saturday about a sleazy attorney. Usually on Sundays, the number of hits I receive decreases significantly from the rest of the week. Thus, I can only theorize that the increase was a result of printing the word attorney a total of five times in my Saturday blog.

To test the theory, I will print the word attorney five times or more in today’s blog and watch the results tomorrow. I eagerly look forward to the outcome as I cannot begin to guess whether I am right or wrong. But if my experiment works, I will have learned a valuable lesson about search engines and keywords -- they have nothing to do with a website’s purpose.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

SELLING CAMERAS

It occurred to me yesterday that maybe I should try selling cameras on my website. I’ve been talking to friends about selling their artwork, but that’s a hard item to sell. Cameras on the other hand could be a natural. After all, the people visiting my site are sending photos they have taken with their cameras.

So, I thought I needed to contact Kodak or Fuji. But I doubt that those big companies would even give me the time a day. And then “voila”, the light bulb went off in my head. The owner of the Camera Co., a local camera business, judges the photos on my website. I should talk to him about selling his cameras on my site. It could be a win-win situation. What a genius idea. Well, maybe not a genius idea. At any rate, I need to pursue it and will get to work on it right away.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

INK CARTRIDGES

For years, I have taken my used printer ink cartridges to the post office to dispose of them. But a few weeks ago, the post office had removed the bins for the used cartridges. When I asked about it, they said the company had gone out of business. In addition, they had no suggestions for disposing of them, so now I didn’t know what to do with my cartridges.

I wouldn’t just throw them in my garbage, as I knew they required special recycling. So I put them in a drawer until I could find out what I should do. But I didn’t have to wait long. A few days later when I returned some books to the library, I saw in their front hallway a big box for used cartridges. I was pleased to have solved the problem and planned to bring my cartridges next week when I returned for my weekly stop at the library.

Unfortunately, yesterday I forgot to bring my cartridges when I visited the library and so I have still not recycled them. The question now is how soon will I remember to drop off my ink cartridges at the library.


By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

DIGITAL T.V.

Along with wrinkles and aches and pains, it seems that old age also brings the inability to figure out “new fangled” things. Last Nov. I purchased a converter box for my T.V. and felt pleased that I actually figured out how to hook it up. But in January I unhooked it so that I could watch a movie I rented. And this is where my problem began.

On Friday of this week, television stations will no longer display analog T.V. Since I haven’t watched television for the past nine months I thought I better check my set today to make sure it worked. Well guess what – no picture and no sound? I immediately called the 800 number printed on the converter box. Thank goodness the manufacturer displayed it so prominently. No doubt they probably expected lots of calls.

To make a long story short, I only had to wait a few minutes and the young man I spoke to very patiently helped me figure out how to fix my problem. I’m glad I took care of it this morning, though it will probably be another year until I even watch another program.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

SLEASY ATTORNEY

Last week I sent a registered letter to the attorney who both drafted my Mother’s will and was the executor of the will. I asked when he would send me the $25,000 that my Mother had willed to me if my sister continued living in my Mother’s house. She bought the house when the two of them moved together to Las Vegas in January, 2008. However, last spring my sister surreptitiously convinced my Mom to give her a quitclaim deed to the house. As joint owners on the deed, when my Mom died, my sister became the sole owner of the house. As a result, I had my doubts that I would receive the money. Nevertheless, I wanted to find out for sure. And so I wrote the letter.

Yesterday, I received a response from the attorney. As I expected, the stipulation was no longer subject to the will. The quitclaim deed overrode it. Thus, I was not surprised. And since the real estate market in Las Vegas has taken such a dive, the house is worth less than the mortgage. But the attorney had the audacity to include with the letter a bill for $175. I was livid. I did not write him the letter to consult him or ask for his advice. I simply wanted to know when I might receive the money. In addition, the letter was only five sentences long. Certainly it took the secretary less than ten minutes to prepare it. And so, if I did owe him any money, the fee would hardly add up to such a large amount.

I have no intention of paying him. But on Monday, I will call the Wisconsin Coalition of Aging and ask their attorney, a service they offer for free, what they suggest I do.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

UNCOOPERATIVE NEIGHBOORS

As President of my condominium association, the burden of condo problems falls upon me. Luckily, our condo consists of only 19 owners, thus we encounter few problems each year. And with the help of my very supportive officers the problems are quickly resolved. But it’s amazing that more often than not, the problems arise from the same few inconsiderate and uncooperative neighbors.

Recently one of the owners, Joel, without previous approval, rolled several large boulders from the perimeter of his property to the common area. As a result the Board began making arrangements to remove the boulders. But we learned that Joel had told Joan, another neighbor, she could have them. As a courtesy to Joan, I called to tell her that we would not take any action, if she would like to remove them in the next couple weeks.

Well, I couldn’t believe her response. She caustically said she was too busy now. She’ll take care of it when she can and I shouldn’t get myself all into a twit (or something like that). I silently waited for her to finish her tirade and knowing there was nothing more to say, I replied simply, “That’s not acceptable, and I’ll get back to her after I talk to the Board.”

It’s a shame she didn’t attempt to be cooperative, because now the Board has decided to send a message to all the owners letting them know that if anyone might like the boulders they are welcome to take them. Meantime, it’s just too bad Joel dumped the boulders on the common area in the first place. However, I shouldn’t complain. If I don’t like the job of President, I can always quit.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

DRY HANDS

Gray hair, wrinkles, aches and pains, to mention just a few, all indicate the characteristics of old age. But last week when I tried to hem a pair of slacks, I discovered another unexpected inconvenience of aging -- dry fingers. The needle continually slipped through my fingers as I poked it into the fabric. With frustration, I kept cursing the needle and licking my fingers, as I struggled to finish the job.

So yesterday I did not look forward to sewing a button on my blouse. There had to be a better way I thought and I tried to come up with some alternatives. I finally decided I could possibly make the work easier if I rubbed my hands with some hand lotion. So when I gathered my sewing kit, blouse, etc, I also grabbed my hand lotion. And lo and behold I could sew much more easily by simply lubricating my fingers. On the other hand it seemed like ever few minutes I had to stop sewing and put more lotion on my hands. But I won’t complain. I sewed on the button with greater ease and much less frustration.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.

BROKEN RESOLUTION

When I made my New Year’s Resolution, in my heart, I knew that like most everyone else I too would break my resolution. But I really did want to change my ways. I really did want to stop staying up late into the wee hours of the morning playing the Free Cell solitaire game on my computer. I feel lousy the next day with so little sleep even though I am retired and can lie around the next day doing nothing. Plus, afterwards, I always chastise myself for wasting all that time when I could be doing something more productive.

So sure enough, I broke my resolve last night and played game after game after game. I know I should stop. I should just turn off my computer. But I love the game and I am so good at it. In addition, each time I win, which is often the thrill of success is so exhilarating that I am motivated to play another game and another and another. I tell myself just one more. But that doesn’t work. I am truly addicted and can empathize with other people who are addicts and just can’t stop.

The only good thing I can say is that since January this is only the second time I broke my resolution. And I really, really, really hope that maybe I will keep my resolution for the rest of the year.

By Hannah --www.FunnyPhotosContest.com a photo contest for cute or funny photos and photo captions.